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Forgiveness, a two-way street

February 27, 2005

JOLLYBLOGGER writes about forgiveness. He points out how are forgiveness is often tied to repentence. This is true, but it is only half of the equation. Forgiveness needs to be given as well as received.
First, let's look at Jollyblogger's first steps. He suggests you think of people who have offended you and ask these questions.

1. How many of them don't even know that they have offended someone else?
2. How many of them know they have offended someone else, but they think that the other person has misunderstood them and is just being a little too sensitive, or touchy?
3. How many of them know they have offended someone but feel that the other person is at least partially to blame?
4. How many of them believe that someone else's sin against them justifies their own sin against that person?
5. How many of them are sorry for what they have done, but not really "sorry enough" in the eyes of the one whom they have offended?
6. How many of them are cold-hearted and just don't really care whom they offend?

This is an good place to start when looking at our heart. On the cross Jesus shows us what true forgiveness looks like.
Jollyblogger goes on to site a Christianity Today article where R.T. Kendall says this:

One of Jesus' main teachings was that we love our enemies, pray for them, and do good to those who have hurt us. It is curious how some of us read the Gospels over and over and miss this. We may get the theology, but not the graciousness that Jesus taught and exemplified.

How much repentance do you suppose there was at the Cross while Jesus hung there? There was not only an utter absence of repentance, but also total contempt. Jesus' reply: "Father, forgive them because they do not know what they are doing." (Luke 23:34)

Grudges, bitterness, old hurts seem to plagueing so many Christians. Forgiveness, praying for our enemies, having the mind of Christ would empower and free the church in such a powerful way, we would hardly recognize it.

But... I believe this is only the first step. Once we've been forgiven we need to accept that forgiveness. I once spoke to a gentleman who said, "How dare she forgive me, I've done nothing wrong!" In addition to forgiving we need to be ready to accept forgiveness, often just as difficult as forgiving. Sadly, we stand before God as well, and refuse his forgiveness because we are unwilling to face our sin. Forgiveness is a two-way street, it must be given, and received. It starts with seeing our sin, and forgiving others for their sin. One, without the other, cripples.

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